Me and You and Something Blue

I want the words to flow here today and break the absence of what used to be.
It had been so long since our last kiss and then I hear the familiar ring of your normal tone.
Everything about you is my normal, but then I remember that those were the days of my youth.
I tell a funny joke to tickle the fat elephant's trunk who awkwardly waits inside. Why does he invade the present with no disregard to our past?
Slowly we break into character and our always ignites and there is nothing in all of creation except for me and you.
Slowly, slowly.
The laughter is so free and the talk is so funny.
Then something inside of me remembers that this is just pretend. No more are we those people who hold hands just because our fingers fit together so nicely.
My jokes run dry and the conversation brings remorse. Accusations ring in my head like a operator's telephone.
Then there was me and then then there was you. Apart. Never to be reconciled.

Fallin', Comin', Breakin'

She was a teenage dream with a whole lotta
Pop.
Always fallin' out over the silliest things.
She could hear ya comin',
And then give some
Smack.
Breakin' free was her bread and butta.
Her heart was pure; her soul purple.
But as unpredictable as
Jackpot.

Wanna know who i really am?
My dark hidden self.
It really is quite a puzzle.
Ok, Here goes.
Throwing away empty makeup bottles is hard for me.
Sometimes I change lanes for no reason at all.
And I like to speed, but not more than 11 miles over.
I wish I was a ballerina.
Dreams of the future are my obsession.
Writing essays gives me deep satisfaction.
Also, I like to write notes to teachers on my tests.
To see if they write back, of course.
Crying is a nice pastime. It relieves anxiety.
Photography and the word Love are pleasing to my eyes.
Reading is unlike any experience. Good or bad.
I've always been proud of my poor vision.
Hopefully I can travel to the most romantic, adventurous places in all the earth.
The Father is my beloved, and I am His.
Always.

The Presence of the Future

Friendship is on my mind as the days until graduation slowly speed by.
It so hard to accurately think of moving on.
The sad part is I know that as I painstakingly predict the future, my glass ball will not tell me the truth.
But nevertheless I still toil over what is to become of people.
Some I believe will go on to be great teachers, doctors, lawyers, writers, and parents.
Others, I don't have a clear read on.
Usually though people turn out a lot differently that planned.
So often I try to see myself in 10 years, but then I realize I can't really imagine myself next year.
I wonder what people predict about my future?
My ears are burning.

Writer's Block

Ever feel like you are watching someone else live your life?
Like the decisions you make on a daily basis is a entity controlling the process, and you are stuck on auto-pilot. Everyday a new emotion experienced but not really felt. They say some drugs make a person loose the ability to feel. That would be the worst punishment in the world. Because although right now I am not FEELING things correctly, I know it is only temporary. So don't do drugs, and don't loose heart.

Oh, So Typical.

Today, call me irritable and rude,
But lucky you, I will be over it in the morning.
Catch me chasing whims and painting flowers,
Catch me with mascara tears streaked across my freckled face.
Tomorrow, shout my name and see me laugh,
see me sharing secrets with my other half.
I'm a pathetic mess with wonderful plans,
I'm a girl just like all the rest.
Never have you met anyone so different.

Forgotten World Give Me Peace Again.

i have never been going through the motions as cheaply as i am right now.
the future encompasses my thoughts, making today seem petty. pointless.
my dreams seem to be stealing the heartbeat of today, which worries me.
i need today to start mattering again.
the haze is covering up my life, making it impossible to be true to myself in
the moment of now.
this mindset cannot be the pattern of my journey,
how can i change?